SELF-AWARENESS GUIDE
Do You Know What Needs To CHANGE In You?
Improving oneself through better feedback mechanisms can help you be more successful
All of us are obsessed with change. Everyone strives to change for the better, self-improve, be more successful and be a better person. But do we really know what we need to change in ourselves? Change in ourselves, is driven by two factors:
- Things that will make you feel happier / better about yourself
- Things that will make others think better about you or raise your social standing
Although, we may be aware of both of these categories, we may not be clear about what exactly we need to change in each of them. Examples of the first category typically include things like eating more healthy, working out more, stopping procrastination, figuring out what you want to do with your life etc. Doing any of these makes you feel you are doing the right thing and being successful at it will give you a shot of happiness (even if its temporary). Most of these things are easy to figure out because you know you aren’t doing it well and its something you should do to improve yourself.
The part that we are more blind sided to is the second part. How does one know if others are thinking well of you. How does one know what people see as good in you and what people wish you’d stop doing? Of course you don’t need to do everything that people say. But sometimes its useful to know if multiple people see something that you yourself are blindsided to. This is often true because studies show that less than 15% of people are self-aware although more than 90 % believe they are!
The second part of change is often closely linked to the first part. When you find success with people i.e. other people start valuing you and treating you with more respect, the joy and growth in your self-esteem gives a tremendous boost to your personal happiness. It makes you feel you have achieved a level of success. Remember success is a measure that is driven by others. Everyone can think that they are successful but real success is if other people say that you are successful.
It has even been established way back in 1902 by Charles Cooley through his Looking Glass Self theory that a persons identity is strongly driven by what he / she believes others think of him. To quote from Looking Glass Self:
Essentially, how one views oneself and acts heavily depends on what the individual believes other people think of the individual
But yet we have not got a good platform to to really find out what others think of us. Up until now, where we built WeSay — What Everybody Says About You a social app to find out from your friends and colleagues what traits and qualities people see in you. Find out from your friends, what’s the best thing in you, what’s the first impression you convey, what’s the one thing you really need to improve upon or what’s the one irritating habit you have? And this is just the beginning. You can get feedback from people you want on virtually anything. You also have the flexibility to say what you want anonymously and privately in case you have to convey something which may not be so comfortable. Use everything that people say about you to also build your reputation — after all your reputation is nothing other than what people say about you!
This video will tell you more about WeSay.
Try the app and see if it helps you affect change in your life. Know what’s holding you back or going well for you at your workplace, college or any other circle. Invite your friends to tell you what they like and do not like in you. Knowing this will definitely give you a direction in which you can take steps to change and self-improve. The app helps your friends give you structured feedback without being offensive and as long as you are someone who is open to taking feedback this app is something you must try and also encourage your friends to speak openly to you.
Do share your feedback in the comments if this has been able to help you effect change in your life!
